1. physical suffering or discomfort caused by illness or injury.
2. careful effort; great care or trouble. (Pain Google)
Fibromyalgia is a disorder characterized by widespread musculoskeletal pain accompanied by fatigue, sleep, memory and mood issues. Researchers believe that fibromyalgia amplifies painful sensations by affecting the way your brain processes pain signals. (Mayo Clinic)
I wake up every day in pain. Sometimes it’s just localized in one or two areas such as my lower back and shoulders. Other days it is wide spread all over my body. Guess what kind of day I woke up to this morning? You guessed it right if you said wide spread. My whole body aches as if I have the flu.
I have my own little pharmacy right beside my bed. I take different medications both in the morning and in the evening before bed. If the pain is too much during the day I also take something in the afternoon. It’s like a never ending cycle that no matter how hard I try to get off this sickening merry-go-round it just never stops! I try so hard not to get frustrated and let it get me down but sometimes I have to stop fighting and just give in and get back in bed. It’s these days that make me feel worthless, useless.
My girlfriend, Kim, helps me in so many ways. I don’t think she really knows how much having her just being here makes a huge difference in my life. She is normally impatient but when it comes to loving and caring for me she has the patience of a saint and I am ever so grateful! She is an amazing woman for all she does for our family. She works hard and rarely ever complains. She cooks on her off days and I never have to worry where our next meal will come from. She encourages me and she inspires me daily. When I’m having a flare up she makes sure that I take my medications and that I am alright. I couldn’t ask for a better lover, partner and friend. Even our busy bee Lizzie helps me out tremendously. I feel blessed even when I feel like a mess!
Fibromyalgia is not for the faint or the weak-hearted. You have to be strong to bear this cross. Today fibromyalgia has gotten the best of me. It may have won today’s battle but I’m determined that it will not win the war!